This afternoon, the Mr. received the following text from Chicky (her comments are in blue)…
She was trying to be smooth…asking without asking, if you know what I mean.
The Mr. was good.
He played along.
But he didn’t cave.
She took it well.
Good thing.
We’d just treated her to a few new items of clothing when she’d come home for Spring Break last week.
It’s Rooster’s turn this week.
Maybe next time, Chicky!
😀
Filed under: children | Tagged: children, parenting | 1 Comment »
My, oh my, how time does fly.
Twenty-one years ago today, preparations had been finalized.
This kid (meaning the one penning this post) was about to have her own child. In fact, I was the same age as the girl-child whose birthday I’m celebrating in this post.
It’s hard to believe.
It seems like only yesterday when I had been wheeled to the hospital from my doctor’s appointment because I was going to have some serious health issues if my first-born child wasn’t induced.
After the epidural, I found myself doing what I do best…chatting on the phone…
After a not-so-difficult delivery, the details of which I will spare you, out came my sweet Chicky, weighing in at 7lbs, 14 oz and 20 inches long…
She was beautiful…even scored a 10 on her second APGAR test!
The Mr. and I took our beautiful girl home, where we attempted to be the kind of parents we’d envisioned ourselves to be.
I’m pretty sure that we were NOT advised to sleep with our child, but when you’re nursing around the clock and frightfully tired all the time, you do what you’ve gotta do, and Chicky didn’t seem to mind a bit…
Chicky grew and thrived, despite the parenting mistakes we made along the way…
Before I knew it, she was celebrating her first birthday. Back then, I wondered, in amazement, how quickly time had flown.
Back then, we didn’t have blogs.
What we did have were writing utensils…the old-fashioned kind.
I have always loved to write, and the feelings that I had when my baby turned a year old needed to be captured.
I sat down that evening and wrote my girl a letter, which I mailed to her with her birthday card since I can’t celebrate her special day with her in person.
I re-read the letter before I mailed it and found myself very surprised at how timeless my feelings were. I realized that the core of what we feel for others doesn’t really change over time.
Sure, they can evolve.
And yes, they can disappear.
However, the love a mother has for a child…well…that’s something altogether different.
It grows stronger, but at its root, it ultimately is just…well…LOVE in its purest form.
I’d like to share the letter I wrote my Chicky all those years ago.
January 22, 1993
My dearest Chicky,
Today is your 1st birthday. It is amazing how quickly the year has gone by! It seems like only yesterday when I was holding you in my arms for the first time. What an incredible feeling that was! It is something that words cannot describe. You were so beautiful! We had been anxiously waiting and praying for you, and to finally meet you took our breaths away. The pain of childbirth was forgotten instantly, and in its place was, and is, this rush of LOVE!
Every day this year, I have watched you grow and learn. Sometimes, I am sad because I know you are starting to need me a little less. Always, though, I am excited. With each new skill you master, comes another open door. Watching you learn has given me a fresh perspective on the world. You notice even the smallest things, and now, so do I. Your creativity has led me to be more creative. There is something I never realized before becoming a mama – that is that although our children learn much from us parents, we learn alot from you, too.
Chicky, always know how very,very much I love you. Every time I see you smile, hear you laugh, or feel your tiny arms around me makes me love you more and more. I thank God every day that He has given me the privilege of being your mom. It is not something I will ever take for granted.
I love you dearly!
Love,
Mama
And now, my message to my girl on her special day.
January 22, 2013
Happy Birthday, Chicky!
You are and have been such a blessing to me!
I have watched you grow so much…even in the last few months…handling some of the most difficult situations a person can go through in such a way that makes my jaw drop open in awe.
I am more than proud to say that you are my daughter, for you excel in every area of your life.
May you continue to grow in God’s grace.
May you continue to trust in His plans for your life.
May you find joy in each moment you are given and lean on the Lord for His comfort during the times when it is difficult to feel joyous.
May God put into your path the perfect help meet…a man who loves God as much as you do.
All of these things and more are what I wish for you on this day, your 21st birthday.
Love,
Mama
Chicky – 1 Year Old
Filed under: children | Tagged: childrearing, children, parenting | 5 Comments »
My sweet Chicky, who is two semesters away from graduating with a degree in Elementary Ed, had to take a big test today.
It was her final state test…the subject area test for elementary school.
If you want to teach, you have to take three tests: the General Knowledge test, the Professional Ed test, and the subject area test for the subject you want to teach.
I have taken (and passed) two subject area tests – English 6-12 and Social Sciences 6-12.
The English was easy. The Social Sciences test was the hardest test I’ve ever taken in my life.
You can imagine what it must be like to take a test that covers everything you’d have to know to teach children in grades Kindergarten through fifth grade.
Poor Chicky was nervous. She had to pass this test before she could register for her Spring internship. She’s taking six classes this semester in addition to fitting in at least 60 observation hours. She’s also got Spring training for soccer.
There’s no pressure whatsoever…said tongue-in-cheek.
She only had a week and a half’s notice about having to take this test before registering for the internship, so she had to cram, let me tell you.
Poor girl.
She was worried.
The test is about $200, and if she didn’t pass, she’d have to wait thirty days to take it again.
My friends, Barb and Lisa, whom I sat at a basketball game with last night, helped me reassure her, via text messages, that she would do fine…that the test wasn’t that difficult.
Still, Chicky stressed.
I understood.
I cried for DAYS before I took my General Knowledge test…all because of the math section. I even cried between sections of the test when I took a potty break.
I was a mess.
I texted Chicky first thing this morning. She had an 8am appointment.
I was eager to find out the results.
She finally texted me back.
My sweet girl had PASSED!!
I called her, and she told me that the test had asked some of the most random questions she could have expected. There was stuff on that test that she either had not learned since elementary school or had never learned at all.
As teachers, we do have to have some sort of foundation of knowledge but, in all honesty, we study our material before we teach it. It’s impossible to be completely sure about every detail of the curriculum. We have so much to cover in a year that one person, unless you have a the brain of a genius, cannot retain everything. Plus, teachers change up the material sometimes, according to student interest.
Anyhoo, the most important thing is that Chicky passed and can focus on her studies and soccer.
Filed under: children | Tagged: children, education, teaching | 2 Comments »
Rooster left bright and early this morning, leaving one chicklet at home.
It was hard to see him go after he’d been home for about a month.
I don’t feel that I got to see him much, though, because I had to work two weeks after he got home, and by the time I got home each afternoon, he was out visiting with friends. Then, after Christmas, he house/dog sat for one of his friends, which meant he only came home for a couple of hours each day.
At least he made some $$, but boy, was it hard only seeing him pop in every now and then.
Still, at least he was in the same zip code, and I could surprise him with lunch or Starbuck a time or two.
In less than nine hours, I’ll be bidding adieu to the other chicklet.
Sigh.
I hate this part of my children’s visits home, and I doubt that I will ever fully get used to it.
Filed under: children | Tagged: children, parenting | 2 Comments »
I rarely speak about politics on this blog.
Although I consider myself a person of conviction, I do not think of myself as one who is gifted with the ability to debate a topic logically.
That is because I think with my heart and not always with my head.
However, after reading an Associated News story about Putin’s support for a law forbidding American adoption of Russian orphans, I felt that I had to write.
As I read the article, I became dismayed when I discovered that this law has namely come about as a reaction against decisions that American political leaders have made that have angered their Russian counterparts.
Thus, Russian authorities are seeking to halt the large number of American adoptions that are nearing completion. The new law will also forbid future adoptions of Russian children by Americans.
Mind you…these adoptions will result in many Russian children leaving the care of the Russian state.
Can someone please explain to me how in the world this makes sense?
Are Putin and all of his misguided supporters so hell-bent on political revenge that they would sacrifice the well being of their country’s defenseless citizens just to make a statement to the rest of the world?
My feeble brain cannot see the logic in this.
As a teacher of under-resourced children, I understand the impact that one loving person can make on a life.
I’ve witnessed the change that one person can make in a young, underfed and unloved little being’s life.
To deny a child the right to a better life is criminal.
It speaks of an unselfishness that goes beyond political rhetoric.
Such a decision brings back memories of years spent in a Cold War; however, the constituents who will suffer the most are those who are unable to speak for themselves…innocents who never did a single thing to deserve a punishment such as this.
Forgive me if I’ve misunderstood some “givens” in life…one of which is that hurting innocent children is the biggest taboo one person can inflict on another.
I thought that children were the force that united people…strangers even.
I’m either the world’s most naive or the most foolish person around for holding such beliefs.
My heart hurts for the children who long for parents to love them…for siblings to play with…for individual attention that speaks of genuine interest in their well being.
My heart rages against the unfairness that exists in the world…the kind of unfairness that has nothing to do with natural disasters that are beyond a person’s control but the man made firestorms that seek out fodder that will keep them on their destructive paths…destruction that has no regard for human lives.
What a shame to live in this kind of world where such selfishness exists.
Filed under: children | Tagged: adoption, children, politics, priorities, Putin, Russia | Leave a comment »
A strange thing is happening around the country.
Have you seen it?
It looks a little something like this…
That is what I like to think of as the Christmas Happy Dance.
While it’s probably not exactly what the shepherds were doing when the Good News was touted by the angels, it IS the dance that’s being done as parents everywhere celebrate their college-age children returning home for the break.
Oh my, but I am thrilled beyond belief.
My own Rooster is coming home today, and I cannot wait.
I warned him that he better expect me to be glued to his hip as an extra appendage for the next month.
Though I’ll have to work and will still attend my students’ sporting events, he can rest assured that there will be PLENTY of Mama Lovin’ Time!
Feel free to join in with me as I dance with joy…
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Well, today could almost have been a carbon copy of yesterday, as far as goodbyes go.
After attending church, where Rooster pitched in to help with the light and sound systems, we headed back home.
That’s where the not-so-fun stuff began.
I heard Rooster make a few trips back and forth between his bedroom and his car.
I weakly offered to help him.
I was not feeling too happy.
Depression always sets in the morning that my babies are heading back to school.
He told me he could handle things himself.
Rooster seems to get a little grumpy before he leaves too.
I think it’s his transition time. I know he’s eager to get back, but I also think that leaving is a little hard too.
We took him to lunch, and I soaked up everything he said…every movement he made.
When he had filled up his belly, we drove to the gas station at Walmart.
It was deja vu.
I stood outside while he filled up his car.
The minutes passed by too quickly.
It was time to say goodbye.
The Mr. went first.
I always like to be the last person to hug the kids when they leave.
I don’t know why.
I reached my arms way up high, for he’s quite tall, and hugged him tightly.
I always give him a kiss, but because he’s so tall, I only pecked his neck.
heehee
As much as I wanted to hang onto him, I couldn’t, and before I knew it, I was waving to him as we drove away.
Sadness descended heavily upon my heart.
When we got home, I immediately left again to run a few errands.
Starbucks was in order, but I started crying on the way.
I sat in the parking lot with tears rolling down my face.
I could not understand why this separation was so difficult…especially given that I’ll be seeing my children again in a couple of weeks.
I called Barbara because I knew she would be a voice of reason and would return me to an un-crying state.
As we chatted, I realized the “why” of my sadness.
Earlier that morning, at church, Rooster’s friend’s mom had approached me and told me how highly Rooster had spoken of me and my teaching. He’d told her that he could see that I was making a difference in my students’ lives, and that I was very committed to my teaching.
Rooster had never shared those words with me.
While he’s a great listener and can, at times, talk a person’s ears off, he still has a somewhat reserved side.
During this visit home, he’d been a little quieter than usual. I don’t know if it was relief from projects and tests he’d recently finished or the fact that final exams are only a couple of weeks ahead.
Thus, his friend’s mom’s words touched my heart and, I suspect, made the parting that much more difficult for me.
I’d had a wonderful visit. Both of my children are so precious to me.
Chicky and I are growing closer…the cracks in our relationship are slowly healing.
Rooster is still exploring options for his future, and it is interesting to listen as he talks about things he’d like to do…different routes he could take.
I am officially on a twenty-day countdown.
There are twenty more school days until Christmas vacation…the time when I can fully engage my heart and brain in the fun of being with my family and, perhaps, enjoy some respite from the hectic schedule that is a part of my profession.
Filed under: children, Teaching | Tagged: childrearing, children, college, teaching | Leave a comment »
If you were driving past Walmart this morning, you might have witnessed an interesting sight…
That of a mama and daddy hugging their sweet girl and her puppy goodbye.
Yes, a gas station isn’t one of those places that movie directors use as their settings for goodbyes, but the truth of it is that when you’re stretching every moment you have with a child, you don’t always select the prettiest place from which to separate from them.
Oh, the bittersweet feelings that invaded my body as I got into my own car to drive away.
As she drove out of the lot, I rolled down my window to give one final wave.
Her smile as she waved back lit up her own car.
Cali, the puppy, was standing on the console between the seats, happy to be on the road with her mama again.
No matter what where the location, goodbyes are never easy.
Filed under: children | Tagged: childrearing, children | 1 Comment »
Black Friday…the day after Thanksgiving…
I usually do not venture outside of the house.
I loathe shopping…for the most part…especially when there are large crowds of people involved.
However, I had a couple of Kohl’s coupons that I’d received in the mail.
Besides that, with Chicky home, I didn’t want to miss spending a moment with her.
So off we went with me adorned in a Christmas sweater and new bling I’d purchased two weekends ago…
Kohl’s was a huge success, and I found a few things to add to my closet.
I even ran into a friend while I was there.
A little later, Chicky, the Mr., and I headed out to Old Navy.
Oh my, but we hit the jackpot there! I selected quite a few things to try on…
I bought two pairs of jeans (my first skinny jeans), a few shirts, and a cute pair of shoes.
Chicky also got some much-needed items. She’s got to spend part of her Spring semester observing a classroom, and next Fall, she’ll be doing her student teaching. New clothes are high on her list this Christmas.
The mail arrived shortly after we arrived home, and I found a package from my friend, Christina…
My little knitting group at school has been having a lot of fun digging through my yarn. The girls are especially drawn to bright colors.
Because Christina could open a yarn store with her humongous stash (*cough, cough*), I asked if she would be willing to donate any. I paid her for the shipping…a small pittance compared to what she stuffed in that flat rate box!!!
She included a special treat, my Christmas present, in the box…
Very Auburn-ish, don’t you think? I grinned from ear-to-ear when I saw it!
Now, though, as the day is drawing to a close, I’m starting to feel sad.
Chicky leaves in the morning, and Rooster leaves on Sunday.
Fortunately, they will be home in a couple of weeks, but still…the week-long visit has been so much fun, and I don’t want it to end!! I’ll be counting down the hours until their cars turn into my driveway for the long Christmas break!!
Filed under: children | Tagged: childrearing, children, Thanksgiving | 1 Comment »
I took a half day off on Friday so I could travel to Auburn to visit Rooster.
It was Auburn’s homecoming, but I was mainly going to see my boy and attend his fraternity’s parent dinner.
The Mr. and I met up with Rooster and spent time chatting with him in his dorm room. His bedroom was a bit of a disaster because he had hosted Chicky, my nephew, and Chicky’s roommate last weekend…
We ate dinner together and then attended the women’s volleyball game, where we scored free t-shirts…
We had so much fun! Aubie and the cheerleaders were there, and the crowd was loud and supportive.
The walk to and from the volleyball venue was gorgeous. The campus is a pretty place at night!!
We bid Rooster goodnight and headed to our hotel.
The next morning, we got an early start. it was just us, a squirrel, and the few other people securing good parking places.
Of course, a trip to Auburn always involves shopping. I splurged a teensy bit…
I returned to the car to drop off my water bottle and was supposed to meet the Mr. at the Alumni Tent. Well, I got lost. Along the way, I did run into part of the band and enjoyed their little per-game show…
Meanwhile, the Mr. had bought a couple of tickets. Boy did we luck out! We sat on the 50-yard line, row 16, next to the student section…
The view was amazing!!
We won…finally!
We met up with Rooster after the game. It was sweet to watch him analyze the game with the Mr. as we walked around campus…
As we walked, we passed below the toilet paper-laden trees (they are still very sick though)…
We had a lot of fun shopping and bought Rooster a new bow tie and a pair of plaid shorts. The boy is developing a great sense of style!
We left him to return to his dorm, while we ran to our hotel to freshen up for dinner.
When we drove back to campus, I stopped by Toomer’s Drugs to get my lemonade fix…
Then, it was time for Rooster’s fraternity’s parent dinner.
We were treated to a slideshow that gave us glimpses into the last two months of our boys’ lives. What fun they’ve been having too!!!
The president and the chaplain spoke, and I was moved by their sincere words.
BYX was started at Auburn in 2008, and it has been growing slowly ever since.
Its mission is to provide a place where Christian young men can strengthen their faith and serve as an example to others that college guys can serve the Lord during these still-formative years of their lives.
This is an impressive group of young men, and I am so thankful that God led Rooster to them.
It is a tangible sign that God’s hand is on my boy, and I find that incredibly comforting when I can’t always have my eyes on the sweet boy I gave birth to so many years ago.
Saying goodbye was bittersweet. Rooster always makes me feel loved and appreciated.
I’ll get to see him in a couple of weeks, and you better believe that I’ll be counting down the minutes, as I do when I know I’m about to see either one of my babies.
Filed under: children, Christian | Tagged: auburn university, BYX, children, Christianity, college, fraternity, parenting | 2 Comments »
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