AuburnChick's Adventures

Not all Christmas memories are good.  After all, life doesn’t stop just because it’s the holidays.

In April 2001, I lost my dad suddenly.  I was still grieving heavily when the Christmas season rolled around.  I’m not sure why.  I guess you can’t put a time line on grief.

My dad always managed to select very unusual, yet thoughtful gifts.  One year, Soccer Chick received a doll that you could transform into Little Red Riding Hood, the Wolf, and the Grandmother…all by simply pulling the skirt over the doll’s head in a couple of different ways.  Another year, he gave her a soccer ball signed by one of the European World Cup teams.  He had gotten it from one of the World Cup games that year.  Very cool.

So, when December arrived, I wasn’t ready for it.  Dad’s widow had notified us that she would be sending us some of his things.  She had planned on sending the package to my sister’s house since I would be in town for the holidays.  However, the mail got delayed, and the package didn’t arrive before I had to leave.

I was devastated.  I had eagerly waited each day for the box, and it had not arrived.  I longed to hold something that had been my dad’s.  I was also upset because my sister would get to go through everything first.  Selfish, I know, but that’s how I felt.

So, the dull ache of pain, much like a toothache, accompanied the holiday festivities that year.  It seems like a waste of energy now, but I felt like I was drowning in the midst of it.  Fortunately, the Christmases that followed have been better.

Filed under: This-n-That | Tagged: christmas, grief |