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The Extraordinary Hodgepodge

As of this posting, there are ten more school days left followed by two teacher workdays.  Everyone is chomping at the bit to be finished…especially the teachers!  A huge thanks to Joyce for her fun, weekly questions!  Play along by posting on your own blog and linking back up with her.

Oh wait!  Before I get on to the questions, I want to give a shout-out to the Podunk, Alabama High School Class of ’88.  Twenty-five years ago, today, my classmates and I were donning our caps and gowns….preparing to end one chapter of our lives while on the threshold of the next.  Thank heavens for social media sites such as Facebook, which have allowed many of us to reconnect with one another.  I haven’t seen many of my classmates in a long time.  I hope someone throws something together this summer.

Enough reminiscing!  Time for the questions!

1.  It’s National Bike Week…do you own a bicycle? When did you last ride a bike?

I own a Trek bike (we actually own two…his and hers).  The last time I rode my bike was last summer, I believe.  I was actually thinking about getting it down and going on more bike rides.  I have the perfect neighborhood for it.

2.  What’s something you learned in school that wasn’t part of the curriculum?

Gosh…as a teenager, there were tons of lessons imparted that didn’t have anything to do with textbooks.  I learned how NOT to be a best friend…oops.  I learned that guys make for very good friends for a girl and won’t stir up drama or tell secrets…unlike girls.  I learned that earning a failing grade on a test did not doom me for overall failure in the class, and that by working extraordinarily hard, I could pull up my grade to an A (chemistry was a difficult class!).  I learned how painful it can be to be the target of a bully and can now empathize with my students.

3.  What’s a food you’ve never tried, but want to try? What’s a food you’ve tried and will never try again?

I want to try a vegan cupcake, but the places in town do not have them made ready-to-eat, unfortunately.  That’s what I get for living in Podunk, USA.

A food I will never try again is liver.  I ate it when I was younger…it was forced upon me…and I will never, ever, ever eat it again.  I’d rather starve to death.  True statement.

4.  Have you been more demanding on yourself lately or less? Why? Do you think that’s a good trend?

I’m an overachiever and am usually very demanding of myself; however, these past few weeks, I’ve actually been leaving my classroom when I’ve put in all of my required hours.  I’ve also been working less from home.  The reason is because I worked especially hard two or three weekends ago to prepare my final unit of lesson plans.  It was so worth the long hours because now I am finally able to come home and relax.

Do I think this is a good trend?

DUH!  LOL.  My life is a lot less stressful at the moment, and I’d take that any day!

5.  Who is your favorite book, movie, or TV show villain?

Boy, this is tough…especially with me being a reading teacher!  Hmmm…favorite villain.  I think I’ll have to go with Heath Ledger’s The Joker.  Last weekend, I watched the movie A Knight’s Tale, and I was reminded of how much I miss this talented actor.

6.  How concerned are you about identity theft?

I’m pretty concerned.  A few weeks ago, my bank card number was stolen.  Fortunately, my bank knew that the attempted purchase was not being made by me, so a hold was placed on my card.  I felt very violated and angry, but I also realize that this is the price of doing business in today’s world.

7.  Would you rather have an ordinary home in an extraordinary place or an extraordinary home in an ordinary place?

I think I’d like to live in an extraordinary place with a so-so house.  I don’t need fancy houses to make me happy.  Give me a beautiful view, then I’m one happy girl!

8.  My Random Thought

Today marks Day 4 of my juice fast. So far, so good.  I’m not feeling many hunger pangs, but the fatigue has set in.  This is typical for juice fasts.  I’m looking forward to the abundance of energy that will fill me as soon as these next couple of days pass.  I’ve been fortunate in that I haven’t suffered from headaches…a miracle considering that I’d been downing two large bottles of soda each day.  This go-round, I have been exercising…a contributor to the muscle soreness I’m feeling this time.

Oh, the joys of trying to be disciplined.  I’m not complaining, mind you…just sharing what’s going on with my body in case you decide to do your own fast.

A Sad Farewell

Today marks the passing of an era.

The school of my childhood is closing its doors for good.

I attended Small Town School from seventh through twelfth grades.  Classes ranged in size from seven students to thirty.  Every grade was comprised of one class, thus it was a small school.  Kids had gone to school together since kindergarten.

May 22nd will mark twenty three years since I graduated.

Time has really flown by.

The school was originally opened in 1966.  Many students have passed through its doors from then to now.  So have a number of teachers.

The year that I graduated, my math teacher retired.  She had been hired the second year the school opened, making for a grand total of twenty-one years of work in one place.  This was especially amazing because this teacher drove almost an hour to work each day.  She was the senior class sponsor.  Truth be told, I think my class did her in and made her finally throw in the towel.

LOL

I’m finding it rather difficult to image Small Town without the school.  So much of who I am today is a result of what happened within those walls.

I’ll never forget huddling by my locker with my first boyfriend.  I remember the day that he hid behind me in an attempt to obscure the principal’s view of him.  He had just gotten his ear pierced, and in those days, boys did not pierce their ears.  It was quite shocking.

I remember the year I had Mr. H as my PE teacher.  We spent our class time walking laps…around his pecan orchard/back yard.  The goal was to never let him pass you because if he did, you owed him an extra lap.

I hated PE from that year forward.

It was also in that backyard where I grew to despise the game of softball after one of my classmates struck a ball that hit me squarely in the knee.  I’ll never forget another classmate picking me up and carrying me up the huge hill.

Mr. H doubled as my typing teacher.  He had been in the military, and let me tell you…the military does not fool around.  We were never allowed to look at our keys, and perfection was demanded out of us.  I lived in fear of Mr. H’s watchful eyes.

His method worked.

I won the state typing championship in 1987, I think…on a manual typewriter.

There are so many, many memories of Small Town School…

Dinner theaters, getting out of class for weeks on end to decorate the gym for prom, football games, dances, making muffins in Home Ec, getting dragged around the school yard while holding onto a mop (I was mature even in my youth…HA!).

Home basketball games were so much fun as was traveling to away games.  Basketball players were required to dress up for away games.  I wonder if they still have that rule.  I remember running one suicide after another in that old gym.  I sucked at running, and I always came in last, which meant I had to run the most suicides as the drill was repeated endlessly.

I’ll never forget losing a classmate in the eighth grade.  It was one of the most devastating experiences of my young life.  Attending her funeral with my classmates was one of the saddest days during my time at Small Town School.  Her parents stayed active in our lives, threw us a graduation party, and created a scholarship their daughter’s honor.  Graduation was a tearful experience as another of my classmates received the very first endowment.

I’ll never forget the day when some of my male *cough* classmates poured superglue on my science teacher’s chair and watched as the teacher sat there, permanently affixing himself to the chair.  That was a bad day for everyone involved.

I remember listening to tales being told of paddlings that had been doled out.  Back in my day, this was still allowed.  Even girls got paddled.  I didn’t.  I was a teacher’s pet.

I remember when my best friend and I visited a classmate in the hospital after he broke his leg during a football game.  I think we were seniors.  We bought him a sketch pad and colored pencils.  This guy had tortured me endlessly since the seventh or eighth grade (all because someone had seen me looking at him like I “liked” him on his first day of school, told him, which led him to hate me and treat me poorly for years).  He looked me squarely in the eyes and apologized that day.

Small Town School was a time of much growth in each student’s life, you see.

I remember my first Christmas at the school.  I did not know that the girls bought gifts for everyone.

And I mean e-v-e-r-y-o-n-e.

I was mortified.

I made up for my lapse the next year and bought all kinds of goodies for the girls.

I still treasure one of the gifts I received one year.  One of my classmates was very artistic, and she decorated plastic plates for everyone, writing their names in the middle.

I still have mine, and I don’t like when other people eat on it.

Tight bonds form when you attend a school that small.

For a school that, in my time, didn’t have internet, cable, or texting, we still managed to stay connected to one another.

Time marched on, I graduated, and so did twenty three more classes.

Over the course of the last year, through the wonderful invention of Facebook, I have been able to plug in to what’s been happening at Small Town School.  It’s been interesting to see pictures of my childhood friends’ children as they enjoyed many of the same activities that generations of children had experienced.  Although the styles of clothing might be updated, the school spirit, joy, and closeness has been exactly the same.

And so I bid a sad farewell to the school of my youth, and I offer up prayers for those who will disperse to other schools, separated from the friends they have grown up with.

Saying goodbye is never easy.

Remember, though, that no matter where we may go, we’ll always share the unique experience of having been a part of Small Town School.

Back to School!

The kids went back to school today.

Normally, I don’t get emotional; however, today is just a little different.

Today, Chicky starts her Senior year of high school.

As I drove home from South Carolina yesterday, I started thinking about Chicky’s journey.

I remember her first day of Kindergarten.  Parents were allowed to walk their children into class that first day.  Everything was so new…and so small!  Tiny tables and tiny chairs…all appropriate for the tiny bodies that would occupy them.

The second day of school was even bigger…car drop-off.  To reduce congestion, parents were required to drop off their children.  Ugh.  I was a mess.  Would Chicky find her way to class?

She did, and we all survived the day with her later telling me about her new adventures on the playground.

I am happy that she’s reached this milestone, but I also cannot believe how fast the time has gone.  You hear it so often when your children are young…enjoy it…it will go by so quickly.

It’s true.

I am keeping myself busy…doing “mom” things of course.  I can’t wait until the kids get home today.  I can’t wait to hear about their new schedules, the teachers, and who’s in their classes.

Back to school…back to the routine.

Although I’ve grown to despise the alarm clock, there’s a strange comfort in the known.

4 Guys, 1 Girl, and a Bible

I think the kids have decided that they like my working at the school.  I mean, how many students can text their moms, on their lunch breaks, and special-order lunch?

For two days straight, Soccer Chick has done just this.  It goes something like this, “Peanut butter sandwich and some pretzels please?”

Sure thing.  No problem.  One of the hats I wear is Short Order Cook.

My plan was to return to my classroom and text Chicky to let her know I was back, with her sandwich.  The classroom I was assigned to today was located in the media center.

As I walked in, I saw Chicky sitting at a table with a group of friends.  We joked a littlet as she grabbed her food from the sack.  I then left to make a quick stop in the teacher’s lounge.

When I walked back through the tables, en-route to my classroom, I was going to give a quick wave to Chicky; however, what I saw made me pause, hand in mid-air.

Chicky (the lone girl) and her friends (four guys) were at the table, eyes closed, Bibles open in front of them.

Yep.

They were having a Bible study…right in the middle of the library…and praying…right in the middle of the library…right in the middle of lunch time.

Pretty impressive, eh?

A Dreary Day

The dark sky I awoke to this morning matched my emotional state.

As I showered, I did so with a heavy heart…knowing that this would be my last “official” day working in the office.  I tried to keep myself composed as I carefully dressed, putting on one of the school shirts that Ms. D had recently given me.  The kids and I read devotions, and I teared up as I thanked God for the job He had given me.

When I got to school, Ms. D asked how I was doing.

“Fine,” I said, with all sincerity.  Until I saw something beside my computer monitor:

I won’t share what she wrote in the card, but the feelings expressed in it mirrored what I wrote about her in yesterday’s post.

That’s when I lost it.

She did too.

We stood up and hugged.

And then we got to work.  And boy, did we work!

This was our second day in a row of severe storms, and we were under a tornado watch/warning for a good portion of the day.  It was also the last school day before Spring Break.  The combination was deadly.  We were slammed with phone calls and visitors…all wanting to check out students.  At times, the line backed up to the door.

True wildness.

A blessing in disguise.

I did what I had done from Day 1 and worked my behind off, never letting on that it was my last day.

Ms. D and I had a few chuckles as we expressed the “Attendance Attitude” at the lame excuses and flat-out lies we were bombarded with.

Some of the ones that stood out:

Bored

Weather (One dad, quite attitude-y in his own right, claimed that the county had issued a “excused” absence for students due to the weather.  Not quite…we chose not to argue, but gave him “The Look.”  His girls were not excused in the computer, and we got the last laugh.)

One from yesterday…Emotionally Distressed (um…who was the child excusing…him or us?  Try “laid off.”)

We were able to get away, individually, for a short time to inhale a bit of food.  During my time, I sat in another friend’s office and told her about my situation.  She already knew…word had traveled fast.  She told me that everyone in the office was extremely sad to see me go.  That made me feel good but sad too.  I want to share the daily routine with these amazing people.

The afternoon rush was much like the morning, and we finally had a few moments of peace around 2pm.

That’s when I broke out the Reese’s Cups I had purchased yesterday.  I told Ms. D that it was time for our moment.  We opened the package and toasted (i.e. “clinked” our cups together much as you do with wine glasses) our time together.  I followed suit with the receptionist and gave the last cup to the 9th grade guidance counselor, who looked like she needed something besides chocolate.  She has a rough job that I have witnessed first-hand during the last few weeks.

Before I knew it, the final bell rang, and it was time to go.  I looked at Ms. D, and she had tears in her eyes.

Sigh…

What a hard day…on everyone.

And then the after-school frenzy began with kids needing bus passes and miscellaneous other things…stuff that’s taken care of after I leave.  I looked at Ms. D and said, “And life goes on.”

And so it does.

Setting A Bad Example

Dear Parents,

This is your friendly, but very aggravated, Attendance Lady speaking.  I hope you’ll hear my words and take some of them to heart.

Today was a discouraging day.

Why, you may ask?

Well, because most of you who I came into contact with, whether it was via the phone or face-to-face, lied to me.

What was it that you lied about?

Take a look at the following picture.

This is Lil Wayne.  He’s supposedly the “in” Rapper of the day…the one who gave a free concert on the beach today.

He was the oh so cool dude you felt your child just had to listen to.

And so you lied.

You gave me a number of reasons why your child needed to leave to hear said singer do his thing.  Your child was either “sick” or had an “appointment.”  When I asked if your child was going to the beach, most of you (with the exception of about five) insisted that you were, in fact, taking your child to the doctor.

I’ll be expecting your doctor’s notes in the morning.

Others of you pitched loud fits when you were informed that other parents could not pick up your children.

My primary responsibility is the safety of your children.  Allowing “Friend’s Mommy” to pick up your child…a person who you would never have considered putting on your contact list…simply to spend an afternoon at the beach certainly couldn’t have been worth yelling at me and Ms. D.

Now, let’s be clear that I am, in no way, a Fuddy Duddy.  I like to have fun too.  But I like to do so in such a way as to maintain my integrity.

Lying…especially in front of or for my children…just doesn’t cut it.

What kind of example does that set for your kids?  Have you ever considered the long-term ramifications of such actions?

Our job as parents is to train our children to become responsible adults.  Lying to get out of responsibility is not what I consider being responsible or mature.

I’m sorry if this comes across as angry or self-righteous.  I know that I am not perfect.  My children tell me this every day.

However, standing on the other side of the desk has taught me a couple lessons.

One:  The rules at school don’t exist to stifle students but to promote an air of academia that allows the students to reach their fullest potential.  Rules are part of life, whether you’re at home, in the working world, or in a relationship with the Lord.

Two:  We all must submit to some form of authority.  It might be a parent, supervisor, or the Lord.  Lying models an attitude of disrespect for authority.

Please remember that I truly do love your children.  I give them band aids when they are cut, and I take their temperature when they are unwell.  I empathize and sympathize.

I’m not the mean Attendance Lady you may perceive me to be.

I’m a caring, loving mom who just happens to be the one standing on the other side of the desk at school.

Love,

Mrs. AuburnChick

Excuses, Excuses

The theme of this week seems to be escapades in the attendance office.  With the time change, FCATs, and the arrival of warm weather, the phone calls and excuses have tripled.

I thought I would share some of my favorite thus far…and keep in mind that it’s only Wednesday…

“We forgot to turn our clocks forward.”  — This was given to me on Tuesday.  Huh?

“My dad left the Sunday paper on the porch until Monday and thought it was still Sunday.”  — This was given on Tuesday.  Huh?

“It’s my son’s 18th birthday, and nobody should have to go to school on their 18th birthday.”  — My mother-in-law gave birth to Mr. AuburnChick’s brother on her birthday.  Maybe she should have called in sick.

“My daughter needs a mental health day.”  — Join the club.

“It’s too far to come into town today.”  — What about the people who drive an hour or two for work each day?

“My daughter has a hair appointment.”  — Hmmm…don’t they make appointments after 3pm?

And here’s my favorite two…both dealing with the same subject…sunburns:

“My daughter couldn’t put on a bra today.”

“My son couldn’t pull up his pants.”

Both kids were too sunburned to come in, and for the first, it was her third day.

Let ’em hang baby.  That’s what they did before somebody…perhaps a man…invented bras.

Before leaving for the day, we go through the sheets where parents and students have signed out.  I laughed out loud when I read the following reason for checkout:

“Through.”

Yeah.  Me too.  Through believing the malarkey the parents and kids are throwing at me these days.

I have the Attitude, or so Ms. D says.  It only took me four weeks.  I still love my job…perhaps even more because of the funny excuses listed above.

Happy Dance Time

I’m doing the happy dance, and it has something to do with this:

Can you guess what the shirt means?

Well, today I was doing my thing at school…answering the phones, writing passes…nothing out of the norm…when the principal’s secretary approached the Attendance desk.

She leaned over (we sit kind of low behind the counter) and waited for my co-worker to finish her phone call.

And then she said the magic words…

“We want you to stay for the rest of the year.”

I’m finding it difficult to find the words to describe the joy I felt in that moment.

Immediately, my co-worker, who I shall henceforth refer to as Ms. D, jumped out of her chair at the same moment I did.  We looked at each other and embraced, dancing around afterward.

I have no idea what the kids in the office thought.  Actually, I really don’t care.  It was a scene that spoke of celebration.  It was one that was repeated many times throughout the day as the word spread.

Those ladies really know how to make a person feel welcome. I mean, I’ve only been working in the office for a week and a half!  I’ve worked in offices for much longer than that and never had bonds develop so quickly.

The principal’s secretary (or is it PC to call her an assistant?) later brought me the shirt in the picture above…a gift for me.

I’m floating on air.

I am incredibly grateful for God’s provision.  While this job will continue to pay the same salary as that of a regular sub, I trust that God will fill in the gap so that my bills will get paid each month.

God is so good…so dependable…so amazing.  I know this in the tough times, and I know this in the easy times.  He never changes.  Thank goodness for that in a world where things are constantly in upheaval.

Some Things Never Change

Day 2 of Rockin’ Rooster’s high school career, and we’ve quickly discovered that he may be a teenager on the outside, but on the inside, he’s still my spastic boy-child.

How many of you have both boy and girl children? Those of you who do have probably noticed something. Girls tend to be more put-together from the onset. Perhaps this is God’s way of preparing females to be the all-knowing, take-care-of-everything people they will one day have to be.

Boys, on the other hand, come into this world outfitted as space cadets. Bless their little hearts. Boys are often the sweetest of the two sexes, but I believe this might be due to the fact that their minds are too busy flitting from one thing to another to hold grudges and whatnot.

It was not without hope, however, that I sent Rooster to school yesterday hoping that he had magically outgrown his natural tendencies.

Not so.

When school ended, he was the first of the Chick children to find my car. As we waited for Soccer Chick to stop doing that annoying thing where girls have to talk to every single person on their way out, Rooster and I began to chat.

“So, Mama, sometime between homeroom and first period, I lost my billfold. You know, the thing I put my entire allotment of lunch money for the week.”

Sigh.

Don’t get mad, I told myself. After all, only the night before, I was crying my eyes out over my baby growing up. I mentally placed an image of Kindergarten Rooster over the high school face I was now looking at.

“So, darling Space Case, whatever did you do? Did you get money from your sister, by chance?”

Oh no. That would have been too easy. He sucked it up and went without lunch. I felt terrible. Even more so because a few days before school started, I had lectured the Chick children on not making a 911 call to my office demanding money or lunch. I tend to be a hard-core disciplinarian. Mr. AuburnChick is a softee. I cannot tell you the number of times he showed up at that school last year with a Subway sandwich for girl-child. Yeah, it got to where he didn’t need to show picture ID to the staff.

That’s embarrassing.

So, after this lecture, you better believe that Rooster did not call either one of us to tell us about his mishap.

I felt terrible.

Rooster, surprisingly, was cool as a cucumber and readily accepted blame. He knew he would be making his lunch the rest of the week.

Well, after coming home, he washed his clothes (yes, I make my kids wash, dry and fold their own stuff), and he excitedly called me from the laundry room.

Yep, you guessed it. He found his wallet, money intact. That morning, he had changed his shorts after he realized that the pair he was wearing was dirty (go figure…he finally wants to wear clean clothes!). The only problem was that he didn’t remove the wallet he had already placed in one of the pockets. And he had forgotten this fact. Until he pulled the shorts out of the washing machine.

Wet or not, it was a great moment.

Until Tuesday morning (yes, this story gets better…keep reading)…

A grocery shopping trip yesterday afternoon left us with a well-stocked fridge. There was plenty of food for lunch, and Rooster decided to take his lunch. I dropped off the kids with a wave and went along my merry way to work.

As I reached down to grab my own lunch from the seat, I noticed something.

Yep. You guessed it.

It was Rooster’s lunch.

Sigh.

Do you remember my post a couple of weeks ago about finding white hairs on my head?

This is a classic example of why.

All I could picture was my boy-child, starving at lunch again. I tried to call him, but apparently he decided to follow the rules and turned off his phone.

So, I texted Soccer Chick instead. She doesn’t follow the rules. She texted back immediately, assuring me that her spastic brother had taken his lunch money, “Just in case.” Good thing.

I’m thinking I might just have to go back to Office Max and purchase that extra insurance for the graphing calculator I purchased yesterday. In Rooster’s own words, “I don’t exactly have a good track record for being responsible.”

Ya think?

Some things never change.

Another Milestone

Do you hear that?

What, you may ask? All you may be listening to is silence.

Well, that’s because my children are busy doing homework. Today was the first day of school, and a couple of the teachers decided not to waste a moment, digging right into the course material. Good for them! After a summer spent beating the drums to the latest tunes on Rock Band, the Chick children need their brains to be stimulated.

For Soccer Chick, this was a regular day. She is now officially a Junior.

Rockin’ Rooster, on the hand, had a big day. It was his first day of high school.

Last night, as I was driving to church to pick them both up from youth group, a slow song came on the radio, and I got misty-eyed as I began to think about Monday morning’s event. How well I remember his first day of kindergarten. Rooster was my buddy when he was a tot. After Soccer Chick started school, Rooster and I had two glorious years to ourselves (at least until 2pm). He ran errands with me, almost always without complaining. Even after he started preschool, I always picked him up in time to eat lunch together.

The day he started kindergarten was rough for me. It was the first time in many years that I had to go home to a quiet house. Being a stay-at-home mom was the best, except for that morning. I walked aimlessly around the house, feeling like one of my appendages was missing. It was…my four-foot walking stick was no longer glued to my side.

In my sorrow, I went to my local ice cream shop and ordered my favorite treat. I was the first person in the shop that day, and I sadly told the owner my story. She commiserated with me as only another mom could.

I remember the relief I felt when Rooster walked out of school that day, as I eagerly waited with the other parents. He had survived, and so had I.

So, the tears flowed down my face last night as I drove. As I pulled into the church parking lot, the following song began playing on the radio:

I do not believe in coincidences. God sees us in our need and provides comfort and wisdom when we need it. Such was the case with the timing of this song. My favorite hymn has always been Amazing Grace, and this modern version is incredible.  God was reminding me that His grace would see me through, and it did.

Rockin’ Rooster got up with his alarm clock and was dressed and ready for devotions when I emerged from the bathroom this morning. I prayed for my children after we read from the Bible, and throughout the day, my thoughts turned to him a few times. Once again, just as I did ten years ago, I eagerly waited for him outside of the school. When he split off from the swarm of kids, I released a contented sigh. My son was fine.

He had survived.

And so had I.

Only by God’s grace.

Praise the Lord.