Pets | AuburnChick's Adventures

Bonnie and Clyde – On the Run Again

Posted on September 27, 2010 by auburnchick

Please study the following picture closely…see if you can figure out what’s wrong with it…

What? You can’t figure it out?

I’ll give you a clue.

Those are my dogs, but they’re not exactly standing in my yard.

Oh no.

See, I was standing in my driveway when I took that picture.

And all I could repeat, over and over, was, “Stupid dogs, stupid dogs, stupid dogs.”

Grrr.

Sometimes it is difficult to be me.

Things always seem to happen at just the wrong time.

What led to the above picture?

Well, it all started last night. Rooster came home from youth group and announced that one of the lenses in his glasses was missing.

Say what?

I should have taken a picture of them. Bad blogger.

He was very apologetic as he explained that he had no idea how he had lost it. All he knew was that one moment he had it, and the next, it was gone.

Poof.

He should get his own show in Vegas.

My friend, Taylor, would surely understand. She has a boy-child who has managed to lose or break every pair of glasses he has owned. And he is all of three years of age, I think.

Well, because Rooster desperately needs his glasses to do such important things as see in school and drive, I called Eye Masters and cajoled them into shaving 1/2 off of the price to replace it. I mean…he’s only had the glasses a month. Doesn’t this speak of shoddy workmanship?

But, to get the glasses fixed ASAP, we had to leave right away.

Rooster and I got in the car, and I started backing out. I hit the button on the garage door opener and watched as the door started to come down.

And then…

A blur…

Two blurs, actually…

One white and one brown.

Oh no.

Molly and Pele.

Bonnie and Clyde…reincarnated from the dead…

Now, this isn’t a new thing, and I should have known better.

Just like the bank-robbing couple, where Bonnie was in charge, and Clyde did the heavy lifting, so it is with Molly and Pele.

Molly is the brains…

Don’t let her cuteness fool you. I think that people said Bonnie was pretty (before she got all shot up in the end).

And Pele…well, he’s the muscle and will foolishly follow along…

Seeing him smile like that makes me see red after what he puts me through each day.

Here’s how their great adventures begin…

From what I’ve noticed, when someone goes outside, Molly starts the run to the door. Pele runs behind her, jumps on the door handle, and turns it…opening the door to freedom.

It used to be funny.

Until days like today – when we needed to be somewhere ten minutes ago.

Grrr…

I have learned that the dogs suddenly develop hearing loss when I call them in. It’s best to completely ignore them and take the fun out of the chase.

But, like I said…we were in a hurry.

So, on a whim, I ran inside and grabbed a jar of peanut butter. I put some on my finger, called Molly, and held out the treat to her.

Stupid dog.

She ran close to me but took off again before I could grab her…not even interested in the peanut butter.

Stupid dog.

I put the peanut butter away and grabbed a bag of baby carrots. My dogs LOVE these.

I went outside and tried to coax them to come to me. This was the picture I got of them…

What? Don’t see the dogs?

Yeah. That’s right. That’s because the dumb dogs ran right past me.

Bonnie and Clyde would have been so proud.

I continued to hold out the proverbial carrot, and finally, Molly got too close…sneaking in a lick as I grabbed her collar…

Just like Clyde giving up the fight, so Pele gave up as well…glumly trotting back into the house, tail between his legs.

Turd.

Yes, I just said that. It’s mild compared to what I would have liked to say to them, but which I didn’t because I do not have a potty mouth.

Fortunately, the dogs are too stinking cute for their own good…

Bonnie and Clyde live to see another day.

Filed under: Pets | Tagged: dogs, Pets | 5 Comments »

One “Mo” Crazy Day

Posted on August 3, 2010 by auburnchick

So, you know that yesterday was my first day as a teacher.

I shared the emotional highs of the day.

What I neglected to mention was how my day began and ended…

Chicky had just taken my picture, and she was about to head out to work with her sports trainer.

I had gone to the garage to start putting stuff in my car.

All of a sudden, I heard loud scratching, followed by the sound of jingling collars…

My precocious fur babies had escaped!

Oh sure…they look all sweet and innocent in the above picture, but believe me, behind those precious faces are wheels that are constantly in motion…coming up with new ways to make me crazy.

I honestly don’t know who is the instigator. I strongly suspect it’s Molly. Pele provides the muscle, and the two of them make for a well-oiled machine.

So, they got out and took off out of the garage.

My heart fell.

It was 6:30, and I wanted to be at school by 7.

My pups love a good chase, so it looked doubtful as to if I would be able to round them up in time.

To make matters worse, I had not put on their collars yet.

Sure, they have microchips, but still.

Ugh.

I went back inside to ruminate. Over the last three years that Little Miss Escape Artist has lived here, we have been through this many times.

I have discovered that part of the fun is in the chase.

I sneak up behind them, they play like they are going to let me catch them, and then they take off as I make a dive, catching nothing but air and a mouthful of grass.

Not pretty.

Anyhoo…

I heard Chicky start the car, so I thought she was leaving; however, when I went outside a minute later, I saw that she had barely backed out of the driveway.

She was standing outside the car, a smile on her face.

The dogs, it would seem, decided they weren’t in the mood to run, and Molly had returned of her own volition.

Yes, folks, if you ever doubted God’s existence, let this be proof.

He had mercy (doesn’t He always) on wee little me, knowing that being late for work on my first day was not a good thing.

We put the dogs inside, praising them all the way, and I left for school.

So, my day went on (I’ll share a cute school story tomorrow). It was incredibly wonderful.

Meanwhile, Chicky and Rooster had gone on a day-long biking excursion with my church’s youth group. This is Youth Week, and there are activities going on through Wednesday. The kids look forward to this every summer. It is a great way to end the summer and kick off the new school year.

The only bad thing about today’s trip, though, was that I had scheduled an eye appointment for Rooster. At the time, I did not have the schedule of events for the week.

So, Chicky and Rooster had to drive a separate vehicle and leave a little early so he could get back in time.

I had a game plan…

As soon as school let out, I would meet the kids at the eye doctor’s office.

When I got there, I did not see the kids. They were running a little behind, so I let the front desk know. Of course, this was the ONE day when they were actually right on schedule.

Go figure.

I have that kind of luck, you know.

Meanwhile, I kept calling Rooster…”Are you almost here?”

Ugh. That is a horrible feeling.

I stood and waited…

And waited…

Finally, I saw Chicky drive up. Rooster jumped out and hurried in.

And then I saw it…

My Rooster…

Gosh.

His hair…

Gosh.

This is a story in and of itself.

See, on Sunday, the youth group had its annual scavenger hunt. It is the big kickoff to Youth Week, and the kids and parents look forward to it.

You might remember my post from last year. It was the first time I had ever driven, and I had a blast!

Although I had lesson plans to write, I decided that I needed a respite from my work, so I gave myself the afternoon off.

The way the scavenger hunt worked was that we had several items we had to find (and take) back to the church. Each item was worth a certain number of points.

Then, there was another list of things each group had to do. The driver (an adult) was the photographer who would snap pictures of the entire group doing the listed activities. The pictures served as proof that we really did what we said we did.

Some of the items on the list included:

Proposing to a random person
Serenading a male/female couple in a public place
Helping an elderly person cross the street
Tossing pizza dough in a pizza parlor
Singing to a child in front of Toys R Us
Braiding someone’s hair
Applying a peanut butter facial
Walking through a drive-thru and pretending to place an order

There were a lot of other things on the list, but perhaps one of the most unusual (and most difficult) was to find someone sporting a real Mohawk. Extra points would be given if the person’s hairdo was dyed.

Uh huh.

You see where I am going, eh?

All of the groups had to meet back at the church by 5:30.

As my group walked in, I saw my Rooster.

Sporting a Mohawk.

With pink, green, and blue sparkly paint to boot.

Gosh.

You might wonder what my first words were.

You would be surprised.

I asked him to let my group take a picture with him.

I like to win.

Remember the chicken biscuit party?

AuburnChick MUST win.

To the point where I hollered, “Don’t let them in,” as my new associate pastor entered Toys R Us with his group.

I’m ruthless.

However, Rooster had other ideas, and they did not include helping his Mama.

He’s ruthless too.

He likes to win.

He gets it honestly.

Well, me being ruthless and all did what all people desperate to win do in situations like this.

I offered him money.

I saw him smile.

How much, he wondered.

Ten stinkin’ bucks.

Deal.

My group got its picture.

We didn’t win though.

We couldn’t find kumquats.

Apparently they aren’t in season, and I didn’t know what they looked like, so I missed the kumquat tree that I passed on one of the roads.

Losing stinks.

But, back to the original point of my story…

The eye doctor.

Rooster walking in.

In that moment, the last day and a half flashed before my eyes.

Rooster came home from church, intending to cut his hair. I had been hounding him for weeks, so he knew I wouldn’t mind the Mohawk since it meant he’d be halfway done with the hair cut.

However, Rooster had been invited to sleep over at a friend’s house.

I had agreed.

I had forgotten about the hair.

This teaching/working thing has totally taken over my life, because although I had remembered about his appointment, I had forgotten that we never cut the rest of his hair.

So, when he walked in, he looked like Billy Ray Cyrus’s son.

Yeah.

There I am in my teacher dress and new shoes, looking all professional, and there is Rooster…sporting a Mohawk.

In the middle of a very busy doctor’s office…the kind where they have something like 20 or 30 eye doctors…who do all of that specialized surgery along with regular checkups.

Uh huh.

I wanted to crawl under the carpet.

I could only imagine what others might be thinking.

Now, this is not to disparage those who wear Mohawks, because there could be some very fine fellows who make well-thought-out decisions to wear their hair this way.

However, my experience has been that when I see kids wearing their hair like this, well, I do a double-take, and it’s not the kind where I go, “Hmmm…their mamas must be so proud.”

Let’s leave it at that.

The only good thing about Rooster’s Mohawk was that he had managed to wash out most of the paint.

Thank the Lord (again, He was merciful). Rooster wasn’t sparkling like a girl.

Yeah.

As a nurse escorted us back to an examination room, I made it a point to have a loud conversation with Rooster…

“The SCAVENGER HUNT was fun, wasn’t it? You were so kind to do this for the SCAVENGER HUNT, weren’t you?”

Yeah, you know those conversations that we have for other people’s benefit.

The nurse came in, ignored the hair, and did her little “Which one is better…1 or 2” quiz. It was all I could do not to giggle.

When she left, Rooster and I busted out laughing.

Oy.

Rooster decided to get glasses instead of contacts. He has had one bad eye ever since middle school…the result of a collision with another student in PE. I finally got him seen about it last year (I am such a good mom, eh?), and he had tried wearing a contact (since it’s only the one eye) but hated it.

Let’s just say that I was a little more than relieved when he told me he wanted to look for frames another day.

He had already outgrown the Mohawk. It had served its purpose and put $30 in his pocket.

Thank goodness.

When we got home, he cut off the rest of his hair.

My clean-cut boy was back.

Praise the Lord.

And so, another day ended…just one more in the saga that continues to be my crazy life.

Filed under: children, Pets | Tagged: children, dogs, hair styles, Pets, teenagers | 3 Comments »

Aubie Feels Left Out

Posted on July 8, 2010 by auburnchick

As you know, three furry babies reside in Chez AuburnChick.

I posted pictures of Molly and Pele in yesterday’s post.

Well, Aubie was none too happy because she did not get any face time on the blog.

She was, in fact, downright sad…

Yeah, I know. I felt bad…just the response she was looking for.

As I snapped photos, I quickly realized that using a flash is NOT the way to go sometimes…

She’s really a sweet girl, despite the demon-possessed eyes in the above picture.

With Chicky loving on her, and me promising to post the pictures on the blog, Aubie quickly forgave me and seemed her normal, happy self…

Lesson learned. Never post pictures unless you have included everyone. Dogs have feelings too!

Filed under: Pets | Tagged: dogs, Pets | 2 Comments »

Oh To Be a Dog

Posted on July 7, 2010 by auburnchick

Oh, the life of a dog.

You sleep…where you want if you’re cute enough…

You wake up when you want…

You go potty and people clean up after you (no pictures of this, mercifully).

You eat, and then you potty again.

Feeling really good at this point, you play…

You nap in the middle of the morning…

Then you wake up again…potty…and generally look cute…

Oh…the life of a dog…it’s not too shabby at all!

Filed under: Pets | Tagged: dogs, Pets | 5 Comments »

AuburnChick Spends Three Hours in the Heat

Posted on June 19, 2010 by auburnchick

Oh my, but my Saturday morning was totally shot.

It all started when I read that my local Animal Control would be offering free vaccinations today from 7am-3pm.

Aubie is a bit late on her yearly shots, so I made plans to get up early and go.

Well, the getting up early part didn’t work out so well thanks to a marathon knitting session coupled with a DVR’d World Cup game from earlier in the day.

Think 1:30am.

Yeah.

So although the alarm went off at 6am, this Chick did not get up.

Until 7:30 when I figured I’d better hurry up and get going.

First, I checked the other dogs’ medical history. Good thing too. It turns out that Pele was due for shots in April, but I never received a reminder postcard in the mail.

Oops.

The thought of taking both dogs did not thrill me. Pele is very strong, and if you remember from previous posts, I become an Iditerod driver when I try to walk both dogs on leashes.

Yeah.

Happy Saturday morning to me.

Coupled with the fact that I have managed to hurt the arch in my left foot…overexuberance on the treadmill this week.

Yeah.

I wrapped sports gauze around my foot to give it more support, held my breath, and called the dogs to the car.

Excited pups is what they were…off for a ride in the Jeep.

After taking a wrong turn and driving around in no-man’s land, which is quite beautiful, I must say, but not when you know there are about a gazillion people wanting to get their animals immunized for free and you’re trying to beat them there, I finally found my way to the Animal Control facility.

I knew I was in trouble when I saw parked cars as I rounded the corner…way before the parking lot.

Great.

I managed to find a spot right across the street (thank you, Lord, for having mercy on this petite, 40 year old woman with two 50+ dogs).

And then I saw the line.

All the way back to the street.

Great.

The humidity level must have been in the 90%.

This is late June.

This is Florida.

It stays muggy 3/4 of the year.

Yeah.

What else could I do? I certainly cannot afford vet visits right now, so I got in line, pasted a semi-smile on my face, and waited.

The line barely moved…for hours.

I could see ahead and wished I was one of those people. Oh, I knew I would be…eventually, but I wondered if I would melt before then.

It’s a very good thing I’ve been running on the treadmill lately.

I’ve gotten used to sweat.

It ain’t pretty, nor am I when I’m covered with it.

Good thing I didn’t shower before I left.

Well, maybe it wasn’t a good thing for the people standing in front of and behind me.

Animal Control had planned things out well. There were kiddie pools (for the dogs, not the people) filled with water here and there. There were doggie drinking bowls everywhere.

The best thing?

State prison inmates and vet techs were walking around handing out cold, bottled water and cups of ice water.

I wanted a cup so badly, but I dared not let go of the leashes, which were wrapped multiple times around my hands.

The kind tech held one for me so I could drink a cup of water. Bless her!! She was an angel in scrubs.

We (the dogs and I) finally made it to the coveted tents that were set up near the building.

Ahhh…shade.

Aubie was tired by now. She’s almost 11 years old, and she decided that the shade was the place to be, laying down and enjoying it. Pele followed suit.

I felt so badly for the lady in front of me. She was a young, petite thing with two very young children in tow, in addition to a cat kennel (which got taken inside by employees as all felines were due to the heat) and a dog.

The dog was playful and kept trying to get Pele to engage.

Have you ever seen the movie Over the Hedge? Do you remember the part where the dog asks, “Play?”

Well, this dog reminded me of that cartoon.

Pele, however, did not like his rear being smelled nor being jumped on. He pretty much ignored that dog.

We finally made it to the building, and I thought the wait was over.

Oh heck no.

Have you ever been to Disney World or some other amusement park where you wait in line to get to the actual ride and discover that there’s ANOTHER line inside?

Yeah.

And the bad part was that the only thing separating me from the room where the vaccinations were being given were two long tables.

I’ve never wanted to cut in line so badly.

But I didn’t.

I have manners.

Plus, I think a few people would have taken me out.

heehee

At least there was air conditioning in the building.

We wound our way around the cages, commiserating with the sad, lonely dogs in each one.

Oh you guys. If I hadn’t already had three dogs, I could easily have brought two of those babies home with me. The worst ones were those in which the owners had surrendered them. It’s becoming the norm these days with the economy so bad.

Sigh.

Down one side, around the corner, and up the other side.

Finally, I was at the other side of that first room, watching others look at me enviously.

Yeah. I felt for them, but not so much since I’d done my time.

There was ONE examination room at the end. One owner and his/her pets were being admitted at a time.

I experienced quite the thrill when I heard, “Next,” and it was my turn.

The business was quick, and it was time to go.

The dogs were in Happy Land. It was all I could do to contain their excitement as we made our way back to the Jeep.

Aubie stretched out in the back seat, finally able to relax as the air cranked out as high as I could make it go.

Three very long hours.

Well worth it.

Filed under: Pets | Tagged: dogs, Pets, vaccinations | 1 Comment »

Presents from Molly

Posted on May 14, 2010 by auburnchick

Nearly every night, when I head to bed, I find the following…

What are they?

Why, bones, of course – from my sweet Molly…

I throw them under the bed, and the gift giving resumes the next night. I think it’s Molly’s way of letting me know I’m loved. Nothing says love like a chewed up bone!

Not wanting to leave out the other dogs, I’ll share a couple of other pictures.

Rooster and I got home the other afternoon to give snuggles to the dogs.

Pele, being his easy-going self, rolled over on his back…very relaxed as Rooster gave his tummy a rub-down…

Later, I caught Aubie looking quite comfy on her bed…

Now that AP exams are over, I think I’ll make myself comfortable for a laid-back, relaxing weekend of my own.

Filed under: Pets | Tagged: dogs, Pets | 3 Comments »

AuburnChick Needs the Dog Whisperer

Posted on March 20, 2010 by auburnchick

The Dog Whisperer could fill half a season’s worth of episodes with the dog issues that exist in the AuburnChick home.

I really could have used his assistance today.

As you know, the weather has taken a sunny turn. In fact, it was even warm enough for Soccer Chick to tan herself by the neighborhood pool. Of course, I did not go. I’m not a huge fan of showing my bod in a bathing suit any more. Don’t want to scare the locals, you know.

So, I stayed inside, caught up in a knitting-induced stupor.

Then, I caught sight of Aubie and Pele, lazily looking up at me.

One peek at the sunny day outside, and I knew what I had to do.

I asked if they wanted to go for a walk. I thought it would be fun to surprise Chicky with a visit from the pooches.

Lord have mercy, but you would have thought I’d told them that there was a garden of treats outside. They were that excited.

I hitched them to their leashes, and off we went.

These are strong dogs, individually. Put together, a challenge for someone as petite as me.

I did the Dog Whisperer thing and kept the dogs close to my side, pulling on their leashes when they started getting ahead. We were making progress, albeit slowly.

Then, an obstacle.

A small dog across the street spotted us and started yapping in that annoying midget-dog-kind-of-way.

Aubie’s ears perked up, and she adopted the predatory look she gets when she envisions something as food. I first saw this look on her face when we had Chloe, the rabbit.

I jerked back on the leash, and she obeyed. She’s smart.

Pele, on the other hand, is a follower. He sensed Aubie’s anxiety and got excited.

He’s almost 80 pounds, and when he pulls, he doesn’t do so gently.

Still, I was able to get him under control.

We tried to walk on by…still across the street, mind you.

And then it happened.

That stupid little yappy dog from a part of the underworld I don’t ever plan on visiting got off its leash and ran across the street in full attack mode.

Why, pray tell, do five pound mutts assume they own the world?

Hello?

There are two sides of the street, and I wasn’t in your space.

But no…dumb dog had to tell us that it owned ALL of the land.

Oh man, but this ticked off Aubie royally.

To her credit, I don’t know if the actions that followed were due to her desire to protect me or to swallow that fur ball in one bite.

Whatever Aubie does, Pele does, much like Simon says.

Through telepathy, my babies took off toward that insane little dog, with me doing my best to hold onto their leashes.

They were too strong for me.

I assumed the position of Iditarod driver.

What? Never seen this?

It’s when you bend your knees and sort of sit into the pull that’s being exacted.

The only difference is that you’re not riding on a sled. Oh no, your sled is your shoes, and the grass is your snow.

Oh yeah. I forgot about the concrete.

I made a rude discovery.

The older you get, the less balance you have…especially when you have about 120 pounds of other living flesh pulling you around.

Down I went.

I honestly don’t remember which part hit first. I suspect it was my right knee, followed by my right hip, followed by my elbow, followed by my wrist.

It’s all a blur.

I vaguely remember being dragged a few inches.

When I looked up, I saw Pele had gotten loose and was running toward Little Dog, who was, in turn, yelping in fear at the sight of Big Dog approaching it.

In my right hand was Aubie’s leash. Although she still had the hungry look, she was not going anywhere thanks to my determined effort.

Pele, being the big but harmless dog that he is, trotted back to me and sat on the sidewalk, waiting for me to pick up his leash.

I took a moment to do a quick body check. All parts accounted for, I ensured that Dog from Down Under (and I’m not talking about Australia here) had not been bitten.

It hadn’t. Lucky thing, even though it was the one who instigated the entire affair.

Leashes in hand, my pooches and I departed for home.

We had not even made it to the corner of my street.

I was mad as a hornet and gave them a What For as I limped home.

When I walked in the door, I broke down.

Then, I did an injury check.

First, my knee was scraped up. Fortunately, I had been wearing blue jeans. Sometimes being cold-natured pays off. While I didn’t have a hole in my pants, I can see where the material was worn through a bit.

Next, I noticed an issue with my right butt cheek (sorry to get descriptive) and my hip. I think I’ll have a bruise from landing there. I probably twisted funny as I hit the ground, hence the hitch in my step.

And then I pulled up my sleeve…

Yes, that’s how dedicated of a blogger I am. In between my tears, released from the surge of adrenaline, fear, and relief, I asked the Mr. to take pictures.

I cleaned myself up (thank you peroxide) and let my boo boo air out.

When Soccer Chick got home from the pool (remember that I never made it to see her), I told her the story.

She told me that although she knew it was scary, the mental picture of me going down and being dragged was a little funny.

She’s right.

But I’m still sore (literally and figuratively).

Chicky was kind enough to bandage me up so that I could write my blog…

If I had the money, I would totally fly the Dog Whisperer out to Podunk, USA to help me train my furry babies better.

I think Little Dog could use some training too.

Filed under: Pets | Tagged: Dog Whisperer, dogs, Pets | 3 Comments »

The Joys of Warmer Weather

Posted on March 19, 2010 by auburnchick

When I came home for lunch today, I took a brisk walk.

Guess who accompanied me?

I think Molly is enjoying the warmer weather too!

Filed under: Pets | Tagged: dogs, Pets | 1 Comment »

Thankful

Posted on November 22, 2009 by auburnchick

During the week of Thanksgiving, I thought it would be fun to name a few things I am grateful for.

I’m not going to name the obvious, because you know I’m thankful for those things (family, home, etc…).

By naming off “smaller” things, I hope to remind myself that it is good to give thanks for ALL things, big and small.

So, the first thing I’m listing is that I’m thankful for the unconditional love of my pets and the time I get to spend “nuggling” with them.

My pets bring so much joy to my life. They greet me when I come home, always wagging their tails as I walk through the door.

They are always ready to play a game of fetch, remind me when it’s time to feed them (like I’d ever forget), and forgive me when their water bowl gets too low.

Simply put, I love my fur babies.

Filed under: Pets | Tagged: dogs, Pets, Thanksgiving | Leave a comment »

My Week – In Pictures

Posted on November 13, 2009 by auburnchick

Yarn...that turned into...

Parts...that turned into...

A work of love.

Two days off from school this week gave me time to paint the toes...

...and to file coupons...

Several batches of cookies were baked in the AuburnChick home this week. Rooster scored two before I could pull out the camera. You've gotta be quick in this house.