It’s been five weeks since I posted an update about my ankle. You might remember that I had to take a break from physical therapy because I had to wait for my insurance visits to kick in again (I am on a six-month rolling program). Ultimately, it’s been 37 weeks since I broke my ankle. Crazy, eh?
Monday, the 24th, was my first day back. I was excited because I had missed the routine of it.
I was a little dismayed when the office staff told me that the physical therapist I’d been working with had been relocated to the the beach office. Ugh. I wish I’d been told sooner because there’s a distinct possibility that I would have asked for my visits to take place there, which would have been a little inconvenient but would have helped with consistency. However, I know that all of the PTs at this place are excellent, so I decided not to say anything. The girl I’d been assigned to is very athletic, and she is a DPT, meaning that she’s a doctor of physical therapy, like my other guy.
My Monday visit wound up only being an eval so she could get the lowdown on my case since she had not worked with me before (we had chatted, but she had not been in charge of me). She also measured my range of mobility and pulled and pushed on my foot. A lot. I discussed my concerns, which I’d made a list of on my phone, and we discussed some of the issues I’m still having. She wasn’t going to be there for my Thursday appointment but said that another PT would work with me.
Rather than having me do any exercises that day, she iced me down and hooked me up to the TENS unit.
That evening, I began experiencing a high level of pain. It was so bad that I may have shed a tear or two. The Mr. and I weren’t sure why my ankle was throbbing so badly. We thought that the manipulation of my ankle had been the culprit. I was pretty desperate to get the pain to ease off and found myself running a bath at 11:35pm.
Despite the pain, I did my cardio and ab workouts the next day.
On Thursday, I had my second appointment, and as soon as I got on the bike to warm up, I knew things were going to be tough. My legs felt like lead; they just did not want to pedal.
I then did my regular calf stretching exercises while the physical therapy assistants tried to figure out what I was supposed to do because my new therapist had not left anything in the computer for me.
Ugh. That was frustrating because my surgeon’s PT script had been written for six weeks, and I didn’t want to waste any time.
This office has a program called MVP that helps athletes transition from physical therapy to more intense athletic training to get back into their sports. My Chicky girl had gone through several rounds of the program, which we credit for getting her in the best shape of her life after she tore her ACL. A couple of months ago, a new athletic trainer was hired for this program, and she wound up working with me on Thursday.
I loved her! I was already in a lot of pain. In fact, I’d been in more pain than usual last week, which I couldn’t understand. We discussed the Beach Body program I’ve been doing for the last three months – specifically the leg workout. I had done this workout on Sunday and had upped my weights. Prior to that day, I’d walked four miles two consecutive days, so I’d pretty much set myself up for the pain.
I pulled up a list of the exercises for her to look at, and she was dismayed. She explained that the moves were too big for what I was ready for, which was why I was having so much pain. She’s got a plan to break down each move into their fundamentals, help me master them where I’m pain-free, and then help me transition to the bigger moves – slowly. She also told me not to do my lower body workouts at home – to do them when I was in physical therapy.
Hearing her tell me that I will be pain free made me cry.
Y’all, the week was just awful. I cannot even tell you. I had to take Aleve two days, which I never, ever do. The pain was probably at a 9 – bone pain that I hadn’t felt in months and months. I’ve figured that I’m going to always be in some kind of pain for the unforeseeable future. The Mr. constantly tells me that I’m doing too much, but I just cannot live my life sitting in my recliner. My body NEEDS to be active; I NEED to burn calories.
So yeah, I had a little cry session right there in the PT’s office.
Bless J’s (the trainer) heart. She was so sweet. She understands my angst because she messed up her knee during a very important track meet that would have allowed her to go to State when she was in high school. As she told me the story, her voice cracked, so my fear was something she could personally identify with.
I got myself together quickly, apologized for my weak moment, and we proceeded. I wound up doing a couple of new moves. One involved putting a tight band around my ankle, with me kneeling on the floor. The band also went around a heavy piece of workout equipment, so it wouldn’t move. Then, I had to, with one foot planted on the floor and my left knee on the floor, lean forward on my right ankle to stretch it, hold it for three seconds, and then return back to neutral.
You might remember that my surgeon diagnosed me with Achilles tendinosis, which is characterized by extreme tightness in that tendon (because of the lack of use while I was in a cast and boot). We have to break it down to allow it to rebuild stronger.
It’s so freaking painful.
The second exercise she had me do involved me in a similar position on the floor, right foot planted and left knee bent on the floor. I had a pole that I had to place at the top of my right foot, toward the right side of my toes. As I held onto the pole with my left hand, I had to lean forward, hold the stretch for three seconds, and then return to neutral.
This was VERY painful; I felt the pain in the muscle on the inside of my ankle behind the ankle bone. It was the PERFECT move that targeted my area of trouble precisely. I’m sure I’ll be doing this move a lot. In fact, during one of my reps, I felt a pop, which was a good thing because that muscle/tendon had been soooooo tight.
Then, I got iced down while I was hooked to the ever-wonderful TENS unit.
I spent the rest of the day extremely sore.
That didn’t stop me from completing the Hogwarts Running Club Eternal Glory 4-Miler virtual race the next day (it was a rest day from my Beach Body program).
Y’all, this was a hard walk for me. I was in pain from the moment I left my house – pain that I had not felt in months. I wasn’t sure that I’d be able to do the entire four miles. I purposely walked slower, thinking maybe all I needed to do was stretch out my ankle.
Nope. It stayed sore nearly the entire walk, but I did complete the whole distance in one try, so the feeling of accomplishment was HUGE.
I rewarded myself by spending the afternoon at the pool and got to chat with my friend, Megan, who was there as well.
On Saturday, the Mr. and I headed out to see a movie, but we had some time to kill beforehand, so we hopped into a store and did a bit of shopping. The walking around was still tough. Ugh. I felt like I did back in March with my foot hurting every time I took a step.
I’m considering calling the surgeon’s office to schedule an appointment; however, I may give myself a few more PT sessions before I do that. I remember him telling me that the new protocol would be very painful.
Check.
He had told me that I needed to ask myself if I felt any better than I did the month before.
Well, I had . . . until Monday evening.
Ahem.
I’ve pretty much decided that I’m definitely going to schedule another surgery to have a few pins removed. One in particular is, I suspect, the culprit for 80% of my pain. Crazy, eh? I’m aiming to have the surgery the week of Thanksgiving but am trusting in God’s timing. All I know is that I’m going to have it before the end of the year. We’ve had a lot of medical expenses this year and have met all of our deductibles, so it would be more cost effective. Plus, I don’t know how much longer I can go with this pain. Some days, it’s almost unbearable, and I’m a tough cookie, so to say that is saying something.
So that’s where my progress stands at this point. I feel like I’ve taken a few steps backward, and I’m frustrated. I’ve had a few pity parties this week as I’ve tried to find reasons for the extra challenges I’ve gone through the last few days. Ultimately, I know that my progress depends on 1) God, 2) consistent physical therapy, and 3) TIME.
I’ve been reminded that I am not a very patient person. I want my old ankle back, and that’s just not going to happen.
I’m not going to lie – #findingjoyinthejourney was a bit difficult this week. Pain is a thief of joy, y’all. I feel overwhelmed sometimes, and that hurts my heart. So much.
I am so grateful that God loves me when I lack faith – when I can’t see the finish line. I’ve had glimpses, only to turn corners and discover hills that weren’t on the original plan.
If you would continue to pray for me, I’d surely appreciate it. This is one hard, long road that I’m still trudging through, a bit unwillingly and very much resentfully at the moment. That’s just me being as real as always.
Thanks all!
Filed under: This-n-That | Tagged: finding joy in the journey, physical therapy, trimalleolar fracture |
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