Oh my word, y’all.  I am having one humdinger of a week, as evidenced by my lack of blog posts lately.

Seriously…the stuff that I’ve had to deal with this week has the makings for a song worth of Johnny Cash, Lord rest his soul.

Here’s a rundown of the happenings thus far, and keep in mind that it is only Wednesday evening.

Monday

6:30am – Rooster wakes up with a horrible sore throat.  We argue as I force him to take Excedrin for the pain.  He goes to school anyway with instructions to call if he needs to go home.

7:15am – Spill water all over papers in the box on wheels that I use to carry school stuff each day.  Great.

8:00am – Education Director comes into my classroom to schedule an observation.  Like a crazy person, I tell him to come during my most difficult class.

8:15am – Spill hot chocolate down the front of my shirt.  Lovely.

8:30am – Rooster calls.  He needs to go home.  He’s about to throw up.

8:45am – I call the doctor and tell them no, he cannot wait until Thursday to go in.  The boy had Strep in March, and I suspect he has it again.  They schedule him for a 2pm appointment.

9:00am – During Planning, I pick him up, run him home, take his temp, tuck blankets around him on the couch, and return to work dejected that I can’t be home with him.

12:30pm – Get observed by Education Director.  Kids, mercifully, behave, and the pronoun lesson goes smoothly.

2:00pm – The Mr. takes Rooster to the doctor.

2:45pm – I receive a text from the Mr., “We’re still waiting to be seen.”

2:50pm – Text:  “We just got called back.”

2:52pm – I arrive at the doctor’s office just as the doctor is sitting down with Rooster.

3:35pm – Drop Rooster off at home and pick up Molly and Pele for annual shots

3:45pm – Molly gets wedged between my car door and the back seat.

3:50pm – Molly is finally free, after using my head for leverage to push herself back up into the car (she was wedged in tight).

3:51pm – Do the Iditarod run, dogs in tow, to the vet’s door.

4:15pm – Get informed that my Molly is a “chunky” 76 pounds.  No wonder she got stuck.  Can you say Doggie Diet?

4:20pm – Drive to CVS to drop off Rooster’s prescription, which is promised to be ready at 5:30.

4:30pm – Arrive home and throw dinner in the crockpot.

6:15pm – Drive back to CVS to pick up prescription after allowing an extra 45 minutes “just in case.”

6:20pm – CVS employee tells me they can’t find his prescription.

6:21pm – Fume in anger

6:22pm – Technician finds the prescription but announces that his insurance information is not in the system.

6:23pm – Fume in anger while insisting it is and that he had Strep in March and that is the only place I get prescriptions filled.

6:24pm – Look for insurance card.  Remember that I gave it to Chicky to take to college.

6:25pm – Fume because I forgot to order another card.

6:26pm – Come up with brilliant idea.  Transfer Chicky’s insurance information to Rooster’s.  Works like a charm.

6:45pm – Prescription finally ready.

6:46pm – Use coupon to score a $25 gift card for filling a new prescription (even good things happen in country songs).

6:47pm – Turn right instead of left on the way to another errand and home.  I’ve only lived here eight years.  The brain is officially fried.

7:00pm – Arrive home and turn on TV to watch Sing-Off.  Cable TV is screwed up, and the people sound like they have Spanish accents…every third word has rolled “r’s.”

7:05pm – Discover internet is not working either.

7:06pm – Fume.

8:30pm – After resetting the modem and still getting nothing to work, call Comcast and score a $20 credit on my bill for my woes.

10:00pm – Collapse in bed.  With nothing to watch on TV and no internet to work on lesson plans, I might as well.

Tuesday

6:30am – Repeat of the previous day.  Rooster is sicker.  He doesn’t go in to school at all.

7:00am – Text the Mr. and tell him to go to Comcast and insist that someone come out to fix the cable.  There’s nothing like complaining in person.

8:00 to 2:50 – Teach my heart out.

1:00pm – 9th grader’s phone rings in class.

1:01pm – Fume.  Rule #2 of 5 has been broken.

1:30pm – Assign student 500 word essay.  Ahhh…consequences.

2:50pm – Get approached by Education Director and told I am supposed to take an education class one time per week.

2:51pm – Fume.  Explain that I am returning to college to complete a 21-credit alternative education certification program that is needed for my permanent teaching certificate.

2:57pm – Finally win the battle after producing course descriptions.  Do the happy dance.

3:15pm – Arrive home to hear Rooster asking if I brought home the Gatorade I had promised him.  Oops.  Out the door I go, only after learning that we now have cable and internet.

4:00 to 6:45pm – Waffle about going to the boys’ soccer game.  Finally decide to stay home and read essay rough drafts.

5:00 to 10:30pm – Go through four pencils while proofreading essays.

10:30pm – Turn on the TV to relax and boot up the computer to blog, only to discover that the cable and internet are out again.

10:31pm – Fume.

10:45pm – Go to bed.  There’s nothing else I can do.

11:00pm – Open eyes to check the lights on the cable modem.  Still only two lights.  Still no internet.

11:01 to 11:45pm – Mentally write out the speech that I plan to give a Comcast representative the next day.

Wednesday

6:30am – Rooster wakes up with nausea.  Can it be…three days in a row?  This is starting to resemble the movie Groundhog Day.

6:45am – Drop off doctor’s note at the school and report Rooster out sick…again.

6:50am – Buy Gatorade at Walmart (you can teach an old dog new tricks sometimes)

7:00am – Startbucks run.  The gal has my cup ready as I walk in.  Peppermint Hot Chocolate soothes the soul.

7:10am – Arrive at school, ready to tackle the day.

7:15am – Send emails to Rooster’s teachers asking for homework assignments.

9:45am – Planning Period – Visit doctor’s office for an excuse for school for the last two days that Rooster has missed.  Visit Comcast and present the sob story pre-written the night before.  Representative promises to have someone out this afternoon.  Go to Bed Bath and Beyond and buy Rooster new bedding, saving $43 in the process.  Cha Ching.

10:40am – Make it back to school with two minutes to spare.

11:40am – Lunch – Drive to Rooster’s school to pick up assignments.  Get lost looking for his English room.  Walk into the wrong portable.  Kids say “Hi Mrs. AuburnChick.  Are you lost?”  They know me well.

12:00pm – Locate Rooster’s teacher and pick up essay folder.  Notice bad grade inside.  Fume.

12:15pm – Quickly run home, drop off homework, and give Rooster his new bedding.  Smile as I watch him smile at the surprise of new bedding.  Joy.

12:30pm – Make it back to school with 30 seconds to spare.

12;31 to 1:25pm – Teach hormonal, giggling teenagers hell-bent on not listening to my well-prepared Pronoun lesson.

1:00pm – Send one student out of the room to collect herself.

1:03pm – Student asks to return.

1:10pm – Send a second student out to collect himself.

1:15pm – Student returns.

1:16pm – Third student insists on interrupting me with questions unrelated to the lesson.  Slyly reach over to desk drawer and pull out green parent contact cards.  Make a show of laying them on my desk first before picking them up and sliding them into back pocket.

1:17pm – Smile inside as the class gets quiet.  Trouble is brewing, but I am in control.

1:26pm – Fume.

1:27 to 1:30pm – Lecture class about respect and almost break down in tears.

1:31pm – Listen to student beg me not to call his parents.  “I’m sorry, Mrs. AuburnChick.”  Yeah.  Kids are always sorry.  Until the next time.

1:32pm – Fume.

1:33pm – Vent to other teachers.  Smile as we make jokes.  Joy again.

2:00pm – Happily greet my sophomores, who are gems.

3:00pm – Staff meeting.

4:00pm – Quizno’s for dinner.  Upon arrival at home, Rooster tells me that he saw a cable guy carrying wires.  Hope.

5:15pm – Attend high school soccer game.  Eat M&M’s and take pictures.  Joy.  Peace.  Contentment

7:15pm – Arrive home.  Cable and internet still working.  Joy.  Peace.  Contentment.

7:30 to 9:30pm – Proofread Chicky’s research paper.  Insert comments.  Email back to her while ducking from the arrows she’s going to throw at me.

9:00pm – Tuck Rooster into his bed, which is complete with his new comforter.  Smile.  He’s happy and starting to feel better.

9:56pm – Blog.

Relief.

Things are back to normal, I think.

And now where’s Nashville’s phone directory.  I have some songwriters to call.  I think I have a very good song in the making!

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